The Need for Center Stage
My sweetie and I are on a roadtrip. He's on tour. Last night, we stayed at an overpriced motel that smelled of cigarette smoke and had loud noises all night long. I hardly slept. I hadn't even wanted to go there in the first place. I would have preferred camping. The motel was my man's pick.
Now, I'm sitting in a car feeling exhausted. Coffee's not helping.
It's hard sometimes.
...To feel fully empowered.
For the first time in my life, I feel like 'somebody's girlfriend'.
...Like a sidekick.
And it's not all that easy.
Is it easier to play the superstar?
To truly support and be in service to someone else....
Well that's something they don't teach your ego to relish.
And yet, still, there is love.
And there are the things that we do for love.
And these things can dig deeper than our frustrations.
So yet, why do we push them away? These feelings that come out of love? Are we scared? That they will break down the ego superstructure of 'hero'?
Are we deeply terrified to NOT be the star of our own lives?
And is this an age-old fear, one that's been around since the dawn of mankind?
Or is it a byproduct of our 'supersize me' modern-day consumer culture?
The answer remains yet to be written...
But I, for now, I will sit uncomfortably between the desperate clinging to my ego's identity, and the deeper impulse of my heart to truly SERVE. ❤️
What about you?